February Fail and March Makeup

So, I guess all of my good intentions about updating this thing on a regular basis have gone out the window, huh? I'm not sure what it is, but I've never been able to keep any standard routine. Ever. Most people would consider this weird about me because of my obsessive compulsive behaviors. I do too.

Anyway, February was utter failure in most respects to my resolutions. I stopped writing out the Bible daily... didn't blog every week... I actually have been baking every week, but only because I'm in a baking class currently... I've still been good about posting a picture a day, but more often than not they seem to be from other days besides the day I'm posting it. Still, my count on pictures for the months so far have been: Jan.. 490, Feb.. 324, and Mar.. 559.

Which leads to the March Makeup portion of the blog.

Where February was me getting off track, I feel like March has been a little bit more of a balance. I basically just stopped what I had been doing in January and started up school stuff in February and March I did a little bit better in mixing the two.

In other news, my life has been utterly surrounded by weddings recently. Two weeks ago, four of my friends got married (2 weddings as I knew both the bride and groom). I was able to go to the one in Sacramento and it was a great time and it was very special to me. Last Sunday I worked a wedding at the Herm that was pretty cool and very unique. They had the reception before the ceremony. I'm also reading a 4 book series about 4 women who own a wedding business together. And this summer I've got a couple of friends getting married that I'm very excited about. I got the official invitation to one of them today and just how much the invitation reflects the B's and G's personalities and togetherness had me smiling for a while after opening it.

So other than all of that I've got regular school and work for the foreseeable future and not much else. Yay.

February

Well, let's see. January is already over. January always seems to be the fastest month to me, I'm not quite sure why.

Plans for February?

I'll be starting up my last semester at Cabrillo. I have two more classes to finish up my associate's in accounting and I'm rounding out my full time status with a spanish wines class, a chocolates class and an intro to baking class. I'm trying not to think about the fact that after 6.5 years in college all I'll have to show for it will be an associate's. But hey, I'm doing it at my pace and I'm accomplishing *something*.

The superbowl is less than a week away and I have no idea who's playing, but I'll be attending a superbowl party.

Wednesday I'm having a "Tax Party" with at least one of my roommates and we'll find some way to make it fun, I'm sure.

Other than that, I don't think I have any plans for February. Hmm.. Might see my folks on their way through on their 30th anniversary. I'm sure I'll have more that I actually do, but right now February seems pretty low key and uneventful. Guess that's the best a girl can ask for so she can keep up with her classes and resolutions.

Weekend Update #3..

Highs and Lows for this past week...

high: I was trained on beverage at work this week and it was the best week of work ever. I really enjoy being trained on new things because then it breaks up the monotony a bit more and I really enjoyed being trained on beverage because it is a more singular job, so it is a lot of stuff that I'm doing on my own rather than out and around with other people. Not that I can't work well with other people, but when given the choice, I'd almost always choose working by myself.

low: I had to buy all of my books and supplies for this coming semester and it was not fun. $100 textbooks for every class, plus extra fees for every class and supplies for my culinary classes. This was especially a low because I should have been able to have fun getting to actually buy new kitchen stuff but the price tags were so daunting and the fact that I had to buy these things made it not fun at all.

Resolutions...

I didn't write any letters this week. That seems to be my hardest one to keep right now. I posted pictures every day. I'm averaging 18 pictures taken a day which means that if I only took one picture a day I'd already be done for the year. I didn't bake anything last week but I'm making an apple betty tonight for community dinner, so that will take care of that plus it will probably be my picture for the day. And I'm only on chapter 32 of Genesis. That's still more than a chapter a day so far, but I'm still slowing down. This week is a lot slower work-wise, so I'll probably put in a lot more time on that one this week.

Um.. I guess that's it for this week. Any prayers for me to find a better job or a way for me to get more hours at Mount Hermon would be great. Thanks.

Weekend Update.. #2

hokay so...

Second week of 2011 is done! whew.. fhew.. wewff?

Um.. anyway..

This week has been good.. highs and lows?

high: Sleepover, Chinese food and 3 movie rentals in a day with Jess. Finally found someone to watch thriller/suspense movies with. Enjoyed the clever dialogue of "The Social Network", finally watched "Inception" and somehow let Scorsese sneak in in "Shutter Island".

low: The fact that the nail polish I only put on last night is already chipping due to the demands of my job.

I guess that's not bad if that's the only low I can think of for the week.

Resolutions..

All going well. Slowed down a bit on the Bible chapters; I hit a bit of longer chapters so I've only got one a day for the week. I'm now on chapter 27 of Genesis. Still, not bad. Pictures.. I currently have 353 pictures in my 2011.01 folder, and that's after deleting the blurry or too bright or too dark types of pictures. I wrote one letter this week, mission accomplished. I'll try to keep it at one a week. Seems good and steady. Baked coffee cake for the roommates a couple days ago, turned out great.

I spent a couple of hours at the beach a couple of days ago and it was great. Even packed a lunch to take with me. I sat there and listened to some very long podcasts about Genesis and watch the tide and the birds and the random passersby. I walked all along the ocean side of the boardwalk down to the very end, taking lots of pictures, then walked all the way to the other end. I am so blessed right now to be able to afford this lifestyle somehow, I'm still not quite sure how though. I guess I'll just have to enjoy it while I have the chance.

Weekend Update.. #1

So I thought it'd be a good idea to set a day of the week that I'd always update my blog, that way I'd be a bit more consistent with it. I thought Sunday would be a good idea, beginning of the week kind of thing, but now I don't know. We'll see how it goes I guess.

Updates..

The new year's resolutions are going pretty well I think.

The 365 photo project is under way and I've taken a few pictures each day, though they haven't all been posts from their respective days (now being posted on facebook) and it seems to be getting some good feedback. I look forward to what I'll be taking pictures of, say, in June. Though, I guess in new seasons there are always new things to look forward to.

The baking is going alright. I made meringue cookies last week with the extra egg whites from making ice cream (technically not baking, so I won't count the ice cream). This was the third time I've done the meringue cookies and I feel like they still aren't coming out quite right. Guess I'll have to make more ice cream so I can have more egg whites to experiment with until I get these things down. Hmm, what should I bake this week. Maybe I'll be really ambitious and go to the store so I can get more yeast and work on some breads... I guess we'll see.

The writing out the chapters of the Bible has been really interesting. I am currently on chapter 20 of Genesis, so I'm ahead and I hope to keep it that way. I'm really trying for a chapter in the morning and one at night. It reminds me of Psalm 1:1-2.. "Blessed is the man who does not walk in the counsel of the wicked or stand in the way of sinners or sit in the seat of mockers. But his delight is in the law of the LORD, and on his law he meditates day and night." That was the family camp Bible verse summer of '08 at CBS and I really want to implement that. Also, what I really enjoy is the fact that it forces me to spend more time in the Bible because it takes a lot longer to write it out then it does to read it. A good friend of mine has turned me on to these really great podcasts from a church in Kansas City. One of their series is called the God Story and goes through every book in the Bible. I think I'm going to try to start listening to those in relation to what I'm writing to re-enforce whatever I'm currently going through.

I, unfortunately, have failed so far in writing any letters to people even though I have had an ample amount of time to do so. I have no excuses, but I won't let that bring me down. I am determined to have one letter written and sent by the time of my next posting next week!

The fifth resolution... I kind of have a couple that go in this spot. These are just things that I want to improve upon myself but don't really wish to expand upon at this time. But I think that as a direct result from my other resolutions, these ones should follow naturally.

Oh right, I almost forgot! I also wanted to make a regular thing on the weekend update my highs and lows of the week, so...

low: Working with a woman who actively ignores me. This is very stressful and I don't know what to do about the situation.

high: Having 3 different days out on West Cliff. One day running by myself, then burritos and surfer watching with Jess and Kirsten, then photographing surfers and sunsets with Amanda.

Prayer requests: I need a new job. Or maybe just another job. Or maybe just to trust that God will provide what I need, whatever that may be. I mean, I guess he's got a pretty good track record thus far, right?

A New Year

Wow, okay, so it's been a little while, huh? Well, it's another year and that wonderful time where everyone tries to be their better selves and resolve to be and do everything they've been putting off. Yup, I am one of those people. I feel like I need some sort of jumping off point if I want something to stick, so I usually have all sorts of things I resolve to do around the new year and my birthday. That being said, I'll let you (anyone who still reads this thing) in on what I've got planned for the year 2011...

1. Write more letters / Keep in contact with friends more (other than facebook)

2. Post a pic I took from my Nikon, preferably that day, every day.

3. Bake more.. I know this is subjective, I just don't know what regularity to use.. once a week?

4. Write out at least one chapter of the Bible every day.

5. Shoot.. I swear I had a fifth one...

Renee - The Quoter, part 4

I've been reading through C. S. Lewis' "space trilogy" ('Out Of The Silent Planet', 'Perelandra', and 'That Hideous Strength') as of late and there was a particular part in the end of the second book, 'Perelandra' that hit me...

"The peoples of the ancient worlds who never sinned, for whom He never came down, are the peoples for whose sake the Low Worlds were made. For though the healing what was wounded and the straightening what was bent is a new dimension of glory, yet the straight was not made that it might be bent nor the whole that it might be wounded. The ancient peoples are at the centre. Blessed be He!" p215

To kind of sum up this book, it is about a planet mirroring our own planet's history and being at the point of The Fall. Ransom is sent from Earth to help prevent this newer/younger planet from making the same mistake we did. The topic of the above passage was discussed throughout the book but I feel like this paragraph especially really finally got to me and some things that I've been trying to figure out. Specifically, it's talking about the fact that because of The Fall and of sin, we needed and were able to experience the glory of God/Christ coming down and becoming flesh to redeem us. But we were not created perfect so that we would sin and be able to experience that.

Reading this has brought up in my mind the struggles I've had with differences between my own testimony and that of others. Especially when I joined InterVarsity I would hear so many remarkable testimonies of people that grew up not knowing Christ and who God transformed out of drugs and promiscuity and many other things. For a long time it was very hard to embrace my own testimony of growing up in the church because I didn't have that story. I felt invalid because my story wasn't as moving as these other people's stories, like I was too innocent and that I had to come from this hard background for God to *really* use me to draw in other people.

(sidenote: I am not in any way saying that I am innocent or that I have never sinned. I sin and miss the mark every day of my life.)

So, what I've come to realize, in a very simplified way, in reading this is that God's perfect glory shines through every testimony and that we were not born good so that we could sin and show God's glory and mercy, but because we do sin, He brings us out of one possible goodness into another that is also completely good and neither is invalid. So whatever story my life will be, the goodness that He derives from that is just as valid and good as the goodness that He derives from someone else's story.

An excerpt from my journal...

[One of my coworkers] said something in the kitchen today that I’m still reeling from. I don’t even know how to process it. I just want someone to come in and say he was wrong and use all the words I can’t find to make it all make sense. He said that we’re basically just a hotel. That the IV groups that come here could do the exact same thing at a hotel. But then, if that’s what my IV had done, I wouldn’t have gone to work for whatever random hotel we would’ve gone to. So why am I here now? What’s the point?

… because just like He can use any person, and has chosen me, He can use any place, and has chosen here. This place is holy ground, all of it. It’s a shelter from the storm for so many people, a safe haven. As much as I am His, this place is His, and He gives it back to us.

Renee - The Quoter, part 3

“In a perfect Friendship this Appreciative love is, I think, often so great and so firmly based that each member of the circle feels, in his secret heart, humbled before all the rest. Sometimes he wonders what he is doing there among his betters. He is lucky beyond desert to be in such company. Especially when the whole group is together, each bringing out all that is best, wisest, or funniest in all the others. Those are the golden sessions; when four or five of us after a hard day’s walking have come to our inn; when our slippers are on, our feet spread out towards the blaze and our drinks at our elbows; when the whole world, and something beyond the world, opens itself to our minds as we talk; and no one has any claim on or any responsibility for another, but all are freemen and equals as if we had first met an hour ago, while at the same time an Affection mellowed by the years enfolds us. Life – natural life – has no better gift to give. Who could have deserved it?”

‘The Four Loves’, C.S. Lewis,  p.71-72.

“For then it will seem to us that we – we four or five – have chosen one another, the insight of each finding the intrinsic beauty of the rest, like to like, a voluntary nobility; that we have ascended above the rest of mankind by our native powers. The other loves do not invite the same illusion. Affection obviously requires kinships or at least proximities which never depended on our own choice. And as for Eros, half the love songs and half the love poems in the world will tell you that the Beloved is your fate or destiny, no more your choice than a thunderbolt, for ‘it is not in our power to love or hate.’ Cupid’s archery, genes – anything but ourselves. But in Friendship, being free of all that, we think we have chosen our peers. In reality, a few years’ difference in the dates of our births, a few more miles between certain houses, the choice of one university instead of another, posting to different regiments, the accident of a topic being raised or not raised at a first meeting – any of these chances might have kept us apart. But, for a Christian, there are, strictly speaking, no chances. A secret Master of the Ceremonies has been at work. Christ, who said to the disciples ‘Ye have not chosen me, but I have chosen you,’ can truly say to every group of Christian friends ‘You have not chosen one another but I have chosen you for one another.’ The Friendship is not a reward for our discrimination and good taste in finding one another out. It is the instrument by which God reveals to each the beauties of all the others. They are no greater than the beauties of a thousand other men; by Friendship God opens our eyes to them. They are, like all beauties, derived from Him, and then, in a good Friendship, increased by Him through the Friendship itself, so that it is His instrument for creating as well as for revealing. At this feast it is He who has spread the board and it is He who has chosen the guests. It is He, we may dare to hope, who sometimes does, and always should, preside. Let us not reckon without our Host.”

‘The Four Loves’, C.S. Lewis, p.89-90.

Renee - The Quoter, part 2

You know that feeling in your heart.. When your heart is just pounding.. like it’s actually outside of your ribs.. exposed.. vulnerable.. wonderful and awful.. and heartsick.. and alive.. all at the same time.. What do you call that?

Uh, love.

"Dan In Real Life"